Sexual Assault Prevention, Avoidance, and Response

Sexual Assault Prevention, Avoidance, and Response

A small guide for anyone, anywhere, at any time…

Have you ever wondered…?

How to not look like a victim of opportunity?

How to neutralize, de-escalate, or egress from an encounter with someone?

Or have you even questioned your ability to know how and when to defend yourself from potential harm?

Here are a few strategies I would like to share with you that will certainly help you understand and answer these questions.

First, how to not look like a victim. Sexual offenders often want to seek control over their victim. Its as much of a “power trip” for them as it is sexual pleasure to know they are in control of you. One simple way to neutralize this is:

Look the person in the eyes. I’m not saying have a staring contest, nor am I saying look away once they look back at you. What I am saying is look at them like you would any person possibly contemplating doing you harm- with humanized seriousness. Read them for a moment, seriously… The only ones who would make a verbal gesture towards you (smiling, laughing, approaching) in this moment are the ones who have already made up their mind to do you harm… You are a human, you have every right to be safe and look at those around you. Most sexual offenders, once looked at in the eyes, will fear either identification, or they will feel you to be a human and will not be able to de-humanize you and attack you as easily.

Once being vocally engaged or harassed, have your mace in hand and ready to be used 

Second, if an engagement is unavoidable then you must represent yourself through your voice as a strong and independent woman.

Speak with confidence! You seriously need to be “Boss B!*#h” in this moment. A little vocal volume is needed here, not much, but enough as if you were briefing a room of executives- it will gather attention of those around you, and also reinforce your stance as an individual. Talk to them stern, neutral, and directly- like a boss talking to a low-ranking employee. Open to hear what they have to say, but no time for BS…. This is also the time where if they say or ask anything inappropriate, you sternly command them to either “leave you alone”, or “let you be”. Again, use a little more volume in this command, don’t keep engaging them with name calling or offensive remarks, just sternly, politely, and a little loudly command, “Please leave me alone now!”

Slightly projecting your voice has a significant primitive effect on humans.

Watch the video below to see exactly how vocal inflection can keep you safer.

Lastly, if someone has ignored your commands and is continuing to make you uncomfortable, then THIS IS THE TIME TO STRIKE THEM!

DO NOT WAIT for them to touch or get near to you! If they ignore your demand and take another step towards you, smile grossly, or say anything more to you besides, sorry…

They have crossed the line.

Strike them with fury! Once someone has crossed that threshold of your safety, STRIKE THEM IMMEDIATELY! Notice I say STRIKE, not fight, or fight back. This is because the last thing we want is to get in a physical altercation with someone trying to cause us harm physically, or sexually.

Pepper Spray and Firearms are meant as tools to give us the greatest advantage possible, NOT level the playing field… Remember, this person wants to sexually abuse you and taint your sanctity forever, maybe even more….

So, we never try to “level the playing field,” we need to have our tools ready to use and use them fiercely before they can ever even lay their hands on us.

Some bonus tips for knowing when it is ok to strike.

This is me, Joe, telling you, it is OK for you to protect yourself! Do not question yourself in these moments!

If someone is within 21 feet of you, and they are not listening to your commands, and they are making you feel uncomfortable- protect yourself NOW!

Always do your best to:

Have your tool ready (mace in hand, in purse, safety off.. or, imagine yourself drawing your firearm clean and proficiently, feel its location on your body),

Look for an immediate escape route prior to using (if you spray mace have somewhere you can run to immediately after because the attacker will probably LUNGE at you while you spray them. For a firearm, gain as much distance as you can (if you can) prior to drawing and engaging, remember firearms are DISTANCE weapons, to be close up only makes you more vulnerable)

Get Loud, Aggressive, and Violent! (F*!K this person! They are trying to do you harm, or they have made you uncomfortable after ignoring your commands of personal space and safety which is a sign that they intend to do you harm! They deserve whatever it is you’re dishing at them, so give it to them good and let it be known! Draw the attention of everyone, press you iphone power button 5 times fast to active SOS and 911 automatically, let that inner warrior spirit rise to the top because YOU ARE GOING HOME UNHARMED!

In the end, if this person maybe never really intended to do you harm, and maybe perhaps because of a past or recent trauma you jump the gun a little and mace them a bit too early….

So, what…?

They’ll get over the burning sensation, you won’t be charged given the circumstances of them making you uncomfortable, and in the end you have grown your confidence and know you have what it takes to keep yourself and those around you that much more safe!

However, always use your best judgement. And know that just because someone is saying, “Hi” to you, doesn’t mean they are a creep that needs to get a can of hot sauce in their eyes….

Thank you all for everything you do to help keep the world a safer place!

I hope this helps!

Peace and Love

– Joe Malone
Self- Defense Expert
Southern Cross CEO

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